FLOYD
LABS
AI that belongs to you, not to shareholders.
Built on spite. Powered by caffeine. Zero subscriptions. One garage. Two cats. 73+ tools and counting.

99.8% uptime. Powered by spite and caffeine. Bella and Bowser not included.
What Even IS This?
Imagine you have a really smart friend who lives in a garage, drinks coffee that tastes like motor oil, and has beef with literally every AI company on the planet.
Ownership
You own it. You host it. You control it. When the company dies, your AI and your data survive. This is not a subscription.
Personality
It has opinions. It remembers stuff. It doesn't ask "Was that helpful?" every 5 seconds. It's not trained by a committee.
$0/Month
Not $20/month. Not $30/month. Not a tiered pricing structure with a "premium" plan that unlocks the useful stuff. Zero. Dollars.
The FLOYD Suite
Floyd CLI
The original AI agent. Opinionated, remembers everything, doesn't suffer fools.
Floyd Desktop
Visual interface for people who hate CLIs but still love Floyd.
Floyd IDE
Code assistant that reviews your work without passive-aggression (mostly).
13 MCP Servers
Model Context Protocol servers running 24/7, because spite doesn't take days off.
73+ Skills
Specialized AI skills covering everything from code review to consensus algorithms.
Memory System
Remembers what you told it yesterday. Revolutionary? In 2026, apparently yes.
“Would a guy in a garage with a Pink Floyd shirt say this at 3 AM while drinking coffee that tastes like motor oil?”
If yes → ship it If no → rewrite it If unsure → add more coffee
Latest from the Garage
All Posts →The Garage Chronicles: Origins Edition
Look. It was 1984. I was seven years old. While my classmates were memorizing the He-Man theme song, I was in the garage...
The Subscription Hater’s Manifesto
Picture this: It's 2026. AI is everywhere. Everyone and their grandmother has an AI assistant. And by 'has,' I mean 'ren...
The Suite
The text came in at 2:47 AM. 'Tornado watch until 6. The cat is under the bed. I am under the cat. The code still runs.'...
Ready to Own Your AI?
We're not a company. We're a problem. And you're welcome to be part of it.
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